exploring life and love with pictures and words
Riding my bike south on the crowded trail, I avoid the darting children and dogs. The sun sparkles on the ocean, the breeze blows my hair away from my face, and I breathe in the spring air. He comes into view, standing, straddling his bike, leaning on the handlebars. Even with sunglasses I recognize his... Continue Reading →
Wandering through a vacant house, dust rests on window sills and molding; I kick up ash, even with my tentative steps. A draft from the fireplace helps the ash to pick up speed, swirling, swirling it travels and leads me through a hall. I hear voices, a television in a nearby room. I know this... Continue Reading →
Evening walk on the beach trail, Santa Ana winds have cleared the sky, stars shine, and the moon hides. Catalina’s silhouette glows in the distance. I glance at the homes across the highway, wondering if my neighbors are enjoying the beautiful view. Elegant pendant lamps catch my eye, and a man tidies his living room... Continue Reading →
The familiar chime on my iPhone calls to me, Look, look right now, RIGHT NOW; you have an email that needs your immediate attention. Mostly spam I know, but I look, sigh and click, delete, delete, delete. More often than not, these messages come from dating sites, E-Harmony, Match or How about We, inviting me... Continue Reading →
I have a tendency to be very hard on myself, hyper critical and unforgiving, particularly when it comes to failed relationships. I don’t cut myself one bit of slack and will generally take full responsibility for the demise of my attempts at together forever or a possible happily ever after. In some cases the blame... Continue Reading →
A few months ago I made a conscious decision to exit the dating pool. It wasn't difficult as my recent experiences in the deep end left my heart a little achy and my ego bruised. It's not the first time I've sworn off men. The sequence of events is always the same . . . date, break up,... Continue Reading →
I spent many, many years dancing the same dance with my son. We had a pattern, a rhythm to our words and interactions. I counted on him to make mistakes and he counted on me to fix them, to rescue him. And like clockwork . . . I came through, every time. I convinced myself... Continue Reading →
At seventeen I married my boyfriend of nearly three years, my high school sweetheart. I was five months pregnant and in love. I didn't marry him because I had to. I married him because I wanted to. The odds were against us for sure, so young without a clue as to what we wanted in the world, other... Continue Reading →
My daughter started wearing glasses when she was 9 months old, darling little cat-eyed bifocals. Her appearance drew a lot of attention as this was over 30 years ago and it wasn't very common to see some one so tiny in glasses. She was a chatterbox and could engage anyone in conversation, usually telling complete strangers the name and age... Continue Reading →
It’s hard to feel grateful today . . . but I can do it. Morning news arrived via Facebook, an emergency, an arrest, a desperate message, a cry for help. My son continues to be consumed with his addiction. I want this to be his rock bottom so badly, but I don’t get to choose.... Continue Reading →
Bare Naked in Public 